We’ve heard that from people for years. Probably our parents were the first ones to say that to us. Do we always learn? Not often enough. There’s another saying – “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” I’ve caught myself doing that, have you? Then the old light bulb goes off and I think of what to try next to get the outcome I want. With horses, each horse perceives things in a different way of how we explain it to them.

Now, we all love to compete our horses. We love to show what we’ve taught them and prove (what we already know) that our horse is the best.

I’ve mentioned how the word testing can put a person in a tail spin, but most of the time we compete for fun. Right???

We take lessons, go to clinics, watch videos, read books, and watch others to learn new techniques. Did you ever think of competing as a learning experience? If you haven’t than you are missing out on a great lesson opportunity.

I’ve seen children come out of a ring elated or crying, and some adults, angry, but wait, if your judge is nice enough to tell you why you placed the way you did (and you can ask), it’s a lesson that you have earned. I always told, especially the children, why I pinned them the way I did. I instructed them as to what they needed to do to place higher in the next class. Did they always make the necessary changes, no, most times they were too nervous to even hear what I said. Sometimes they did take my advice and pinned better in the next class.

Now I usually tell them to check with their instructors what I have just told them. Usually the instructor will agree with me and encourage them to make the corrections. I never want to undermine their instructors, but sometimes it gives the instructor food for thought as to something they may have missed, or to the person or parent, if their instructor is giving them the right information.

It’s not just a matter of Yay! I won, or pooh I lost, it’s a matter of learning from our mistakes.

Riding competitions highlight our strengths and weaknesses, use the information wisely.

I had a slight situation the other night, nothing to write home to mother about, but just an everyday kind of thing, that needed to be addressed. It was something I thought that I might want to discuss with you all.

I hated history in school. However, the Civil War was the only thing that caught my attention. Having lived in the North, and now the South, it gives me a different perspective on things. The people up north really don’t care much about anything other than what affects their present, individual lives. The people down south have a bond to this day. The people up north will come together when they are attacked, 9/11 is a perfect example. The people down south, in the undercurrents of their everyday existence, are always bonded. I always loved the movie “Gone With The Wind” even as a child. As an adult I understand the emotions behind what they lost. To many, it wasn’t entirely about the slaves, but the ways in which they had grown up. The loss of innocence. Their way of life, “Gone With The Wind.”

I’m not a big TV watcher. I thought I might like to see the mini-series Grant, but I really didn’t care if I did. Sat down after feeding to eat my Fudgsicle and Bobby (who was asleep) had it on. They got me right from the beginning when they spoke of what an amazing horseman Grant was. I’ll pretty much watch anything that has horses in it. When he jumped over the barricade, I was hooked. (but whoever described much of the horse action was not a horse person) I watched it for a half hour and taped the rest. When I wrote this I hadn’t seen the second or third episode yet, but all through the first they spoke of his horsemanship. I guess what most amazed me about the man was his calmness through all his struggles in life, and battles, but what really caught my attention was his ability to assess a situation calmly, and determine what was the best way to handle it.

This is something we should constantly be doing when dealing with horses. We’ve been taught (hopefully) the right way to do things when training, riding, and just working around horses in general, but sometimes you have to adjust the methods with the current happenings. Nothing is cast in stone. The whole key to Grant, and us, is that we have to make decisions calmly and thoughtfully, but most importantly for us, in the blink of an eye.

I was trying to feed the other night right after a storm had come through. It had stopped raining, but the wind was kicked up and there was a cool breeze after a very hot humid day. Well you know the deal, the horses were galloping, bucking, rearing, and carrying on. My one Thoroughbred (of course) wanted to share the play with me. He stood rearing and bucking at the gate so I couldn’t get in. I figured that shaking his feed bucket would get his attention, he didn’t care, he wanted to play. He knew it was feeding time, he knew why I was there, but just like a child, he wanted to play, with me now. Okay, switch tactics, but to what? If feed didn’t do it what would? My first thought was to walk away, wait for him to settle, and then come back. But this became a challenge to me. Not from the horse, but from my mind. I can learn something and add to my knowledge base. I thought, nope, I needed to redirect his attention somewhere else. You know, get his mind back on me. So I took a shot in the dark. I had a carrot in my back pocket left over from earlier in the day (don’t usually have any at that point). It wasn’t big, just a bite size. Pulled it out and asked him “you want a carrot?” All motion stopped. Nose came through the gate, with ears forward and a big “yes please” on his face as his lips were motioning to the carrot to come on in. Shocked me, but go for it. Gave him the carrot and while he was chewing I opened the gate, put the bucket towards his nose, he said “yay! dinner” and followed me to his feed bucket, quiet as a lamb. Well quiet as a lamb for him.

I know in the past I’ve told you how to distract students from worrying when learning to ride. I know I’ve discussed distracting a horse from his focus on the wrong things while riding. Yes this is another instance of distracting a horse, but this post is about you, about staying calm, calculating the situation, and coming up with another idea to accomplish what you want without injury or loss of time. Remember, they forget over time what they did wrong. I, however, forget over time what I was going to do.

It’s amazing how just about any venue can teach us something about horses and us, even a mini-series about a General. Always keep a listening ear, and an open mind. You will always learn something.

There is always disagreement on a lot of things in the horse world.  Different training methods, disciplines, equipment, feed.  A lot of it is just preference, and some of it is past experience.

You must take into consideration all the aspects of the subject.

Research, research, research, before you make a decision.  Then come down to logic.

The subject of an over-check on a driving harness came up in one of my daily readings.  There is tack that is necessary, tack that is unnecessary, and then there is tack that will enhance you training.  Just like with a simple snaffle, it can be gentle and easy, or cruel and severe in the wrong hands.  I’m working on a post on bits right now.  There is a time and place for some training equipment, but there is a lot of abuse with some of it if not properly used.

The person that was telling the story had a driving instructor that wanted that over-check pulled really tight.  She did not feel comfortable with this nor did her horse.  When she called another trainer she was told that what she was being asked to do was not proper.  So she switched trainers.  She was happy and so was her horse.

I’ve said it many times, keep an open mind.  What works with one horse may not work with another, but if a little voice inside of you says “this is cruel” check it out.

Let’s look at the history of the over-check.  For those that are not familiar with it, the over-check runs from the horses back, up his neck, and down to the bit.  It’s purpose is to keep the horse’s head up.

You may remember in the story of Black Beauty, the owner wanted the horses over-check pulled really tight so that the horse’s head was held high because that was supposed to show a proud spirit and elegance.  Depending on the placement of how the horse’s neck is set into its shoulders, cranking a horses head high can be not only uncomfortable, but extremely painful.  You all know that some horses carry their head higher than others, it’s just the way they are built.

Now on the flip side of that coin you don’t want to let your horse get his head down too low.  This can create problems too.  Sometimes that horse will lean on the bit, or grab the bit and just take off.  You want them to be comfortable, but they should carry their heads at a proper level so they can’t get in trouble.  Don’t forget that for a horse to see things in the distance they must raise and lower their heads until things come into focus.  We’re not talking excessive movement, just slight.  Driving horses also have blinders on which limits their peripheral vision.  My dear friend Nancy could speak more intelligently on this subject, but you’re stuck with me.  Nancy feel free to comment and give us your knowledge, and respected opinion on this matter.

I have used an over-check on a riding pony.  Chester, my grandchildren’s pony, was wonderful with the kids, but he was a pony.  He found out that if he put his head down to the grass, pulling the reins, he could pull the kids right down his neck onto the ground.  Now the over-check wasn’t used to keep his head up high, it just didn’t allow him to eat grass or pull the kids off.

When I used to drive, the over-check was used for the job it was meant to do, but not to the point of being abusive.  Nothing is cruel if used properly in the right hands.

And as my mentor, Adele Franzreb always said – “If you don’t know what it is, you don’t need it.”

So always check that your equipment fits properly and is used for the purpose it was intended for.

Check, recheck, over and out.

But it will give you something to think about.  (I hope)

Why do we get so comfortable with our horses that we stop being careful?

Today Bob and I went to help a neighbor who had a car go through her pasture fence.  Now I’ve known this girl for over 20 years.  Great trainer, rider, and horsewoman.  She had on sneakers.  I do that all the time in the afternoons.  Now I know better.  My toes are living proof that I don’t always do things I’m supposed to.  I just went big bucks to a foot doctor to make my toe nails look like they used to.  It’s down to having my toes done by my farrier in order to get them trimmed.  There’s a fungus among us that won’t quit.  The doctor was really impressed that he couldn’t help me.  My last resort is drugs. (But my liver will not be impressed)  My GP told me to just put a lot of nail polish on them.  When he looked the last time he said “it’s time to go to a foot specialist.”

Dawn (the Clyde) originally took the nail of the big toe off.  Just as it was almost grown in, one of the other ones did the same thing.  After that it got fungus and went down hill.  Then it spread to the others.  Yuk!

But my point is why do we do things like this.  Why sneakers when we know better?  Why do we find our fingers in the wrong places?  Why do we still throw lead lines across our shoulder that has 1000 lb. horse attached to it?  Why do we bend down to brush or wrap a leg in front of the horse?  Why do we stand behind the horse when we’re brushing their tails?  Why do we not pay attention when we’re under the horses belly?  I do catch myself and make a correction, but after 55 years or more why am I still doing stupid stuff?

If a small child went to walk around the back of the horse we would either tell them not to, go around the front, or go wide.  Then why don’t we always remember to do it?

Is it the old “Oh it won’t happen to me” syndrome or what?  We know better, right?  Don’t we like ourselves?  Are we stupid?  Are we paying attention?  Don’t we care?  Are we in just too much of a hurry?  Are we too lazy?

I know I switch out of my boots in the afternoon because it gets hot and the hot humid environment in my boots is just what the fungus loves so I do it just to spite the fungus.  But I know better.  Of course I don’t do bare footed anymore.  Now that’s a step in the right direction.

So I’ll keep trying to correct my casualness, but I will also keep asking myself “WHY?”  How about you?  Are you even aware that you are doing something dangerous?  It just takes one time you know.

Did your parents do that to you?  My mother tried it every chance she got.  She would say “oh feel sorry for that little string bean, it’s lonely, you have to eat it.”  Really??? a string bean has feelings?  My mother was good at manipulation.  She wasn’t big on spanking but boy she would never let you forget when you made a bad decision.  I would say “just hit me and get it over with.”  She also never told you that you couldn’t do something right, she just said to let her do it because she had more practice and could do it better and faster.  So with all this said, I have a horrible guilt over things.  I carry it along like dragging a bag of dirty laundry.

Now Bob doesn’t use the guilt factor, but the animals sure do.  It’s the eyes.  They look at you with the eyes.  The puppy has it down pat, much like my mother.  “OMG!” she’s my mother reincarnated!  The growling, the whining, and the guilt, especially the guilt.  Good thing I don’t believe in reincarnation.  When Bob and I are getting showered and ready to go out, she comes crawling with her one shoulder to the carpet, with her one eye looking up, and piddles as she comes, like “no, you’re not going to leave me again.”  Then she checks if she piddled and crawls around feeling guilty.  “Oh no! did I lay a guilt trip on her too?”  Now I’m my mother.

Although the puppy has it down pat, the horses know how to work it too.  Zoey is very good at it.  I guess 18 years of practice works.  And people think animals are dumb.  They lay a guilt trip for a second or two, but it sticks with me for days.

My friend finally decided her Thoroughbred is not the horse she needs.  All she really wanted was a quiet trail horse to ride around her neighborhood.  She really loved him and he is so personable, but he was keeping her from her goal.  He needed more, she needed less.  It wasn’t fair to either of them.  So she sold him.

The trailer arrived to pick him up.  The horses that were down by the barn were put in the barn, they all came to attention.  Fri started screaming, Zoey was circling in her stall, Copper stood watching intently, and Tigger started pacing.  Why was that strange trailer here?  Was someone new coming or was someone here leaving.  Tig was pulled from his stall and now everyone was responding.

So my friend led him out and showed him the trailer.  He loaded just fine the week before in to the boogey dental trailer so this one was more like my trailer and I didn’t think there would be a problem.  She handed over the lead to the trucker, figured it was his equipment let him do it.  He was kind and gentle.  Took his time and tried to make friends and comfort Tig.  Tig was kind back, but had no intention of getting into that trailer.  Nothing bad, just a little side to side evasion tactic.  The driver tried for about 10 minutes using all the normal logic.  A little lunging, a little backing, and more calm attempts.  Now Tig is very food motivated and will usually follow a bucket of sweet feed anywhere.  Not this time.  His owner got his favorite horse treats.  Nope.  We tried standing on each side of the ramp.  Nope.  He would get to the base and just stop.  He kept his eye on me the whole time.  I kept my eye on him the whole time.  So I went and sat on the mounting block and watched from a short distance.  I figured if I was out-of-the-way he’d have to pay attention to them.  She tried loading him.  No his eye was still on me.  We put a chain on his nose, and I went back to the mounting block.  Nope.  I could feel him pleading with me to make them stop.  I told the trucker, he’s not a bad horse, he’s just testing you all.  What I knew was that he knew exactly what was going to happen and he didn’t want to leave his home and his friends.  “All I could hear in my head was “please make them stop.  I don’t want to leave.”  Ripped my heart out.  I couldn’t stand watching his anguish, he was getting upset.  So I walked over, put the chain in his mouth.  Now the trucker protested, said he didn’t like to do that to a horse.  I told him I don’t believe in it either, but he’s off the track and is used to it.  I also told him that you don’t use it, it’s just there and he calms down and accepts things.  I spoke with Tig and told him he had to do this.  He put his head up in protest as I started to walk him.  I stop and told him that this was unacceptable behavior.  He dropped his head and followed me right in.  When I clipped him in the trailer he placed his nose against me like he always did.  I told him I can’t help him this time, and we closed him in.  He started pawing and complaining about what was happening.

This was the beginning of this horrible nightmare of a guilt trip.  First of all I always hate any of my boarders horses to leave.  They are like my babies.  Then to have this horse trust me that I would make this all go away and I didn’t, hurt me immensely.  He trusted me and I let him down.  It wasn’t my choice, but I didn’t want him to become more upset than he was.  My girlfriend followed the trailer to where it was going and told me that he was so lathered and dripping wet that the trailer floor was covered in sweat.

Now Bob was a great help.  He told me “that horse will never trust you again.”  No he probably won’t, but I think I could get him to.  However, he won’t ever have to.

I just pray that he will have the home that he really needs, with someone who will love him and do things with him that he really loves to do.  We were trying to fit a square peg in a round hole, and that just never works.  He’s a sweet boy and deserves more out of life than he had here.

I still cry and I’m still carrying the guilt that I betrayed his trust, but in one of my morning readings God spoke to me.  It said “I know that the Lord brings one blessing after another, but I’m so full of the past that there’s no room for the future.  I have to let go of what’s already gone.”

He’s moved on, now I have to.