I have a friend, for many years, and in all the years I’ve known her, you can’t tell her anything. She will come up with every reason known to man not to agree or take your advice. She has horrible back pain, but will she listen to the doctor and take pain pills, no. She’ll come up with many reasons why she can’t. So for 30 years I listen that her back is screaming. You kind of lose compassion when you know she could do something about it, and doesn’t.

Now when people are paying me for my knowledge of horses and riding them, they usually will listen and at least try. If for some reason they, like my friend, come up with reasons why they can’t do it or just won’t try, I suggest they might try working with a different instructor or trainer. I tell them that another person might be able to explain things where they can grasp, and apply it. It’s very frustrating to an instructor to see a problem, know that it might be dangerous, explain how to correct it, and have the person just shrug it off. I always tell them that we don’t say “I can’t” here, but rather that “I’ll try.”

Now when it comes to a purchase of a horse, that’s a whole different ball of wax. (Now where did that saying ever come from.)

I know that vets are not supposed to tell a person to buy or not buy the horse the client is looking at. They are just supposed to supply the facts of their findings. If you explain what your intention is for this horse, they can say that the horse is physically capable of doing that particular job, or no it would be unable because of certain findings. If a horse has side bones it’s not a good idea to barrel race them, or do any other discipline that would require them to make sharp turns consistently.

As for me, I’ve always tried not to get involved with the sale or purchase of a horse. First of all I’m too honest, but I usually do have an opinion, just keep it to myself. I will make an exception if I feel there is going to be a dangerous situation involved. Most times I go by my gut feeling. Of course I’ll listen to the vets report, if there is one, but unless you’re paying big bucks, most people don’t get a full vet exam.

One of my lesson kids was buying a horse. First red flag was her name, Luna. (I’ve mentioned this before) I asked if it was short for lunatic? Her answer was no Luna as in moon. She really wanted this horse. I was just brought in to trailer this horse. I didn’t feel good about this horse, but went along with it. Second red flag was when the horse kept running away with her. Now she was a good rider, so we worked with the horse for quite a while. Still not good feelings. Then when the horse started running through the fence with her on board. I told her the horse had to go. Of course she felt she could work the horse out of this. I went to her parents and said that the horse was dangerous and needed to be sold. It was.

So when another friend went to purchase a young filly, you know, the one of your dreams, and the deal just kept falling through I told her that I didn’t have a good feeling about it and she should pass. Her reaction was “no, I know this is right, I want this filly.” Well she’s taken it slow with the training for a year or two now and the mare keeps losing it. She’s afraid of any loud noise, like rain on the roof, has to wear ear plugs in the barn, and when she is being ridden. Now she kicked my friend and broke several ribs. My friend is contemplating selling her. She has a habit of not making wise decisions when purchasing horses, or keeping them. I recently found out that two other people were not on board and thought it would be a better idea for her to pass on this filly, one being a vet, the other an animal communicator. I’m glad I’m not alone in my feelings. If she doesn’t believe me, that’s one thing, but when you don’t listen to a vet or communicator, there’s not much I can do or say.

I get the whole idea of not believing a friends concern, but if you are paying someone for an opinion, and they are knowledgeable, I think you should listen, or at least save your money and their time, and just not ask at all.

So why don’t people listen? Why do they ask at all? I guess it’s because they just want someone to agree with them, and if you don’t, you’re ignored.

My theory – Don’t ask me, I may tell you what you don’t want to hear.