Ah, grade school, back in the 50’s. I’d forgotten all about learning to stop, look, and listen until I was trying to come up with a title for this post. It popped into my head, and then I had to think about where I had heard that before. When we were young we were told to do that when we went to cross a street. Now children are taught to stop, drop, and roll when in a fire situation. This saying will stay with them for the rest of their lives, as well it should.
I went to a schooling show the other day, hoping to meet up with some friends I hadn’t seen in a while. I took one of my new students along. She’s not from this state so she gladly went to see what was going on. It became more of a lesson, than her actual lesson was that day. We stood there and discussed the way things were done when she rode in college competitions, as opposed to what they were doing at this show. I told her how I was taught to judge a class, and we compared notes on people’s good points in their riding ability, and what wasn’t so pleasant. With some I just couldn’t watch, and kept turning away. It’s like watching an accident or a fire. You don’t want to watch it, but you are drawn to it. I told her things I would like to see done different, and why.
It became a very interesting conversation. I learned more about her learning process, things other instructors had disliked about her riding, and her previous experiences. When someone comes for a lesson you usually don’t get to spend that much relaxed time just chatting. She told me that she needed to do it herself in order to learn. We talked about breathing and relaxing your spine when riding. There were so many people who were there that were holding their breath and just pounding on the horses back.
Most of the horses were very forgiving to their riders. They kept a pleasant attitude even though their mouths were getting yanked on and their backs abused. Where are their trainers when this is all happening. Or maybe the better question is – do they even have a trainer? Everyone needs to be watched. We all pick up bad habits that we are not aware of. I’m sure these people had no idea that they were holding their breath.
It was obvious that some of these people were afraid of their horses. There was really no basis for the pulling going on. It was just a tug of war. None of the horses were looking to run away. It was just the rider was nervous, felt out of control, and pulled, so the horse pulled back, and so it continued. I so badly wanted to rush up and say “wait, try this,” but they weren’t my students, and it wasn’t my place. Just drives me nuts.
However, when I see a beautiful horse, with a young rider who is trying her best, I just have to go up and complement them. It’s a really nice thing to do for someone. Yes people you know can say nice things, and you accept their comments gratefully, but when a stranger takes the time and comes up to you, it means even more. The horse was an Andalusian Stallion. (I didn’t even know he was a stallion until her mother mentioned it.) He was beautiful, relaxed, knew his job well, executed every move smoothly. (This was a Dressage Class) just the picture of grace. The mother was calling out the movements and got way ahead of what was to be performed next. The girl told her mother to wait up and the judge (being very kind, I think she was impressed too) asked them both to go back to the movement before and start again from there. The judge could have written them off as having blown the test (even though it was a schooling show) but she gave them another chance. The judge was kind and instead of being impressed with her position, chose to help teach this pair, let them learn, and present the best performance they were capable of doing. Way to go judge!
Speaking with them after the class I learned that he was a stallion, and he was looking for girlfriends. I asked what his breeding was since I did not see a tattoo, although she said something about he had one. I told her that he was absolutely beautiful. The girl said he was her mothers horse. Her mother said that he was the family horse. Humility, beautiful horse, beautiful people. The owner had a kind, gentle attitude and the horse reflected it.
So the next time you see (Look) something that takes your breath away, or someone who is trying very hard, Stop and take the time to complement them, Listen to their story, and give them encouragement to continue what they are doing. It will not only bless them, but you will be blessed too.