On a chilly February morning in 2000, as the first pink rays of light were streaking across the sky I watched my new Clydesdale baby arrive. She was laying in the mist that was covering the ground. Her mother Maggie was standing next to her.
Bobby was getting up every few hours to check if she had been born yet. Maggie was spritzing milk when we came home from hunting the night before, so we figured that the baby would be coming that night. We put Maggie in the pasture right outside our back door so all we had to do was turn on the flood light to check. Maggie had other babies before, so we weren’t worried about the delivery. At 5:00 a.m. I heard my husband yell “What Maggie still no baby?” So I turned over and went back to sleep. At 6:45 I heard “We have a baby!!!” Looking out the back door all you saw were beautiful white legs. We rushed out into the ground fog and we were gazing at this big chestnut filly with the most beautiful legs you ever saw. We decided to name her Magnolias Misty Dawn. Southmoors Ideal Magnolia was Maggie’s name. Well when she stood we noticed there was a problem with those long white stockings. Her back legs were wind-swept. They went off to the side. I was assured by my vet that they would straighten and they did. There’s not enough room in the womb for all those legs, he said.
She grew to be quite a character. She never had a work ethic, she thought work was unethical. She also thought that she was a lap dog, not a horse. She loved shoes, other people’s. When she was little she got an infection and, along with her legs, spent a lot of time on bed rest. My Jack Russell and I would sit in the stall with her, with her head on my lap, and I would sing to her. Through her many trials in life, singing always calmed her and encouraged her. It brought us closer together.
So today as I waited for the vet to come and put her down I did the same thing. I sat on the ground and stroked her head, singing the same song I sang to her as a baby.
She’d gotten a spider bite seems like 5 or 6 years ago, maybe it was more, who’s counting. It left her back left leg in a bad way. A couple of weeks ago she got an abscess in her one good back foot. Now we’re talking a 1500 – 1600 lb Clydesdale. But she had the will and the guts to fight this. I didn’t realize she wasn’t walking to get water and she colicked (yes you add the k) a week and a half ago. Got her through that. But her legs took a toll that day. She was tired. Started sitting on the fence and then leaning on trees. When she laid down the other night, and then tried to get up, she hurt her front left shoulder. There was not one of those things that would kill her, but put them all together and you had a major problem. My vet also thought that there was more going on, like maybe cancer, because of the gradual weight loss.
Watching her struggle was hurting me so bad, but if she wouldn’t give up, neither would I. So every hour Bobby or I would walk up and give her water and food. Her butt got raw from the bark on the tree so we wrapped the tree with a moving blanket. Her spider bite leg swelled up to the size of the tree she was leaning on. She finally laid down last night (Monday) at 5:00 p.m. and this morning (Tuesday) she didn’t get up. She nickered to me this morning like “where is my water and breakfast?” So as the good room service provider that I am, I brought the princess what she wanted, along with a bag of carrots. Breakfast was as usual, but in a reclining position. She was alert and demanding. Yup she’s herself. Not ready to give up yet. She laid there, flat-out, munching on her hay.
The sun was starting to rise, just like the morning she was born, but this time she wasn’t going to get up and great the new day. I called my vet and told her I needed her. She would come out and we would discuss the situation. By the time she got there Dawn’s eyes were half closed and she didn’t want any more carrots. She was telling me, she was done. It’s funny, both people and animals rally just before they go.
Forty years ago my vet, at the time in another state, told me that a horse would tell me when it was time. Dawnie did. I told Dawn, as the vet was ready to give her the first needle, that she needed to go to her mom, go to your mama my girl. She wouldn’t be in pain anymore, and she’d be able to run again with straight perfect legs clear across that Rainbow Bridge. A very dear friend, who wanted to be with Dawn in her last hours, said “okay, the go to mama put me over the edge, as she started to cry.”
When I called my prayer partner from church who had been praying for her, to let her know that I had released Dawn from this life, she told me how sorry she was and how sad it was. I told her that, yes even though I would miss her, God had told me that we humans had the wrong idea of death. Death was just a transition from one life to the next. It’s not really the end, but just the beginning; there would be no more pain, and she would be with her mom and her friends who were killed two years ago by lightning. I said it’s really a beautiful thing. When I said this, my friend said she wanted to remember that when her sister, who is very ill, dies. How sad for non believers. We focus too much on the loss we are feeling, and not enough on the beautiful life they will be entering.
My wonderful Pastor who is a dear friend and golfing buddy of Bobs, and my church family have been praying for Dawn for over a week. One man said he has never prayed for a horse before, but now he has prayed for her for the entire week. I feel that they are apart of Gods Creation, and if God knows every sparrow that falls, He certainly knows of His other creatures great and small. My Pastor feels that all our animals are family members and should be cared about, and prayed for in the same manner. The Bible speaks of horses often, with grandeur.
See our horses are teacher even until the very end. Or is it the new beginning?
Rest in peace my sweet baby girl, but run with the wind and let those beautiful white legs flash with the heavenly light.